Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Dear Mister Fanboy Science: Can Power Girl's Breasts Cast Such A Large Shadow?

Dear Mister Fanboy Science:

My name is Jimmy McDougal. I am in the Mrs. Wendryhowski's 7th grade class at Enola Gay Middle School in Ames, Iowa. Our teacher assigned us a science project about the sun. I know that as the sun rises and sets shadows can get longer and shorter, depending on the time of the day. But can our body parts, like our noses, or, ummm, other parts, cast shadows? I am enclosing a cover from an upcoming comic book so you can see what I am talking about.

The woman in the front is Power Girl. The woman in the back is Black Canary. They both look pretty realistic to me. I mean, the women on MTV and the Disney Channel all dress like this. But one thing about this realistic comic confuses me. Can a women's ... you know ... boobs - I mean BREASTS - cast such a large shadow on their owner?


Jimmy McDougal

Dear Jimmy:

Thank you very much for your insightful question. While I agree that these two women , particularly the obviously apt-named Power Girl, are a true representation of the modern woman, I am unable to answer your question at this time. Without examining the subject up close it would be irresponsible for me to venture an opinion. However, using body language theory, this Power Girl is clearly a strong willed woman, one who is intelligent, honest, and even-tempered in all her endeavors. Contrast that with Black Canary in the back. Her slumped shoulders and inferior "stature" clearly point to a troubled soul, one who is unsure of herself and who can rarely make an intelligent decision. It proves the Hugh Hefner Hypothesis: She with the biggest breasts MUST be the best. It's science. It can't be wrong.


Mister Fanboy Science

P.S. If you were able to arrange a one-on-one with me and the subject I would be able to more definitively answer your question and ultimately enrich scientific studies, which is really for the children.

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